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[gotup]

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[gotup]

When Steve gets the email full of links from Tony, he takes the time to go through each of them carefully. Then he reads them again and makes notes - wonders idly if he could get away with consulting notes during a scene. (Tony probably wouldn't notice, he concludes, but it still seems rude to him.) It takes him longer to work up the courage to text him than the rest combined - a few days, in fact. Look, it's a little intimidating, okay?

I think we need to talk, is all he sends at first. Maybe he should be doing this via email. Before he has a chance to talk himself out of it (and talk himself into composing a long and probably awkward and embarrassing email), he hits send, and all he can do is wait for Tony to reply.

[myheartglows]

The e-mail of links arrives late the day that Tony vacates Steve's bed, but after that, no one sees hide nor hair of Tony Stark at the compound even when a shipment of parts arrives for the workshop. Without their intended recipient present, Steve needs to sign for the delivery and determine whether to leave the boxes on the ground floor, direct the worker and his dolly, or carry them up himself. Most of the shipment are actually large wooden crates cautioning heavy load.

Still, when Steve sends his text, it only takes a handful of minutes for the ellipses indicating typing to pop up on Steve's phone, followed by the word bubble of Tony's answer: About?

[gotup]

Perhaps unsurprisingly, Steve carries all the boxes up himself. It's not like it requires much in the way of effort for him, after all, and the delivery guy is glad enough to not have to tote them around. He takes the utmost care with them - who knows what might be inside - and shows no inclination to peek in the boxes. If they're for the workshop, it's probably boring (to Steve) mechanical stuff.

Establishing boundaries. Deciding what you want. That sort of thing.

[myheartglows]

I see someone did their reading. I didn't look too hard for any of those articles btw. Mainly just made sure they weren't full of dog shit. So, Q&A time?

[gotup]

Well, I appreciate it. I never would have been able to find the right stuff on my own.

So, what do you want from this? Other than getting to spend time in subspace.

[myheartglows]

I'll tell you what I don't want. You thinking you can take over my life. Ordering me around whenever. I'm still me. Just because I bottom doesn't mean I bend over backwards for you with just a stern look. So sometimes you tie me up and use your Captain voice till I go all spacey but nothing else changes. After that's sent, the ellipses blinks across Steve's screen again for a time, but it disappears with no other message forthcoming.

[gotup]

Steve just rolls his eyes, because of course Tony has to be difficult. He's just trying to feel his way through something totally alien to him with the help of a few damn blogs, all of which say that you have to be totally honest and forthcoming with your partner, and Tony is being...Tony.

God, no, I don't think I could do that all the time. I don't /want/ that all the time.

He keeps writing "I want you" over and over and then deleting it.

Do you want me to tie you up? is what he sends instead.

[myheartglows]

The ellipses blink, then stop, then start again, until: That is one of my preferred methods of play yes. Including blindfolds, gags, and any form of sensation play.

[gotup]

Well, at least they're getting somewhere. Even if it leads to even more questions on Steve's part.

But you still want non-sexual scenes.

This is one of the things Steve has a harder time understanding, and he thinks he'll need to go reread one of the articles again. Being restrained seems sexual to him, but he can also see where it's a method of relinquishing control.

What am I supposed to do with you when you're tied up?

[myheartglows]

Non-sexual on my end. Idc where you stick your dick. Fuck my face like you did in the shop or my ass though that's more of a yellow or beat one out on me, just don't try to get me off. After the next thirty or so seconds, if nothing new is added to the conversation or even in the process of being added, Tony types more. The next line down says, Sorry. It's Pepper. I'm not over her.

[gotup]

As much as Steve wouldn't mind fucking Tony, he doesn't want it to solely be as just a hole for him to use. It's uncomfortable, thinking of doing something that intimate and the other person not deriving any sexual pleasure from it. Hell, the one-sided sexual aspects in general weird him out a bit, although he understands why, and he understands why Tony is mostly okay with it.

It's okay. That's why we're talking about this now, so I know what to do when you're in subspace.

What are your other hard limits?

[myheartglows]

Somehow I don't think we have to worry about you tripping on those. They're not exactly beginner friendly. Just use your best judgment.

[gotup]

...Tony, have you seen my best judgment?

Look, if Tony can be a brat about this, so can Steve.

[myheartglows]

Ok. Let's try this. You name a kink or a fantasy or idea you want to act out and I'll vote yea, nay, or requires negotiation. Simple.

[gotup]

Tony, in case you didn't know how out of my depth I am here, kink didn't even have that meaning back in my day.

[myheartglows]

You mean to tell me you've never had a dirty thought or fantasy while jerking it? Ha. An eye roll emoji is inserted here. I'm not buying it. I call liar liar loins of fire.

[gotup]

I never said that, they just aren't very exotic.

[myheartglows]

So? Here's some perspective, you sent me under by telling me to hold a pose. That was it. I don't need a whip and thigh-high leather boots to have a good time.

[gotup]

I mean, you probably have the legs to pull them off, though. ;)

But this isn't really about my fantasies. It's about taking care of you. Letting you get out of your head for a bit. Whether or not I get off is secondary to that.

At least, that's what he's gathered from reading the articles - and, to an extent, what he already figured out: Tony's needs are more important than his. When he's in subspace, he needs to be cared for, guided. (This is all written in his notes.)

[myheartglows]

Nothing, not even the dots, pops up after that. In the basement of the Stark estate on Fifth Avenue, which Tony is converting to a bare-bones work space (he's long emptied it of Howard's old Vault items), the phone's backlight shudders off as it slides face-down across the table. Tony himself slouches forward with his fist pressed to his mouth. He doesn't know what he wants out of this arrangement with Steve, just that he wants to stop hurting for a while. The easiest path would be bearing physical pain instead, or someone using his body, until he floats. But...

Nearly two hours later, past nightfall, Steve's phone pings with a new message in the conversation with Tony. It reads, Could hand feed me. Fruit or something. Maybe with a blindfold.

[gotup]

Steve smiles a little at the message and glances over at his notes, where he's written and underlined "a good dom wants to see their sub grow and improve as a person". It feels healthier than just using Tony for his body, that's for sure.

What kind of fruit do you like?

[myheartglows]

Berries. Various. Cherries, grapes, apple slices. I'm not picky. Prefer sweet over sour. Whatever it is it needs to be bite size.

[gotup]

With your disposition, I'd think you would enjoy tart fruits. ;)

How do you feel about dips?

[myheartglows]

Hold up. Forget the dips. Go back one. Did you just throw shade at me?

[gotup]

...wait, what?