[He takes Tony's look in and, for a second, forgets all about turkeys, and nearly forgets about the ham. Then he remembers what he's doing and neatly cuts a slice off, proffering it briefly on the point of the knife before he pulls it back.]
Where are your manners? Say please.
[Yes, Tony's being lectured about manners by a guy who spent decades living in a cave.]
[ tony narrows his eyes when teased, more assessing than angry. when that passes he tilts his head, looking at simba from the corner of his eyes, too prideful to bend. ] I'm not begging for table scraps. Gimme.
[He just snorts and extends the slice again. At least he's asking - sort of - instead of wordlessly demanding. That's probably about as good as he's going to get (and, to be fair, he's a guest in Tony's home, he shouldn't expect anything). But also-]
You this nice to all your guests?
[Also, he can't help being sassy, even though he knows damn well Tony's gone above and beyond to accommodate his needs.]
[ tony snatches the slice with a triumphant "thank you" and folds it whole into his mouth. even chewing and his mouth full, he shoots simba a closed, smug grin. sorry, can't answer, enjoying his victory ham. ]
[ tony's smile softens at the second offering. he takes it, but also signals a time-out while he chews and prepares a sandwich using the second slice. as he rummages in the fridge, the day's tension seeps out of him. there's no board member to argue with, no marketing plan to approve, no ten rings encampment to blast apart (wouldn't mind one, though). just the world's weirdest, most platonic roommate/sugar baby ever–which reminds him, he really needs to get that girlfriend. he should call up lina again. she's cute. he likes her.
tony swallows, finally. ] Whaz the... oh, yeah. Every couple days? Just until I find a supplier. Then we'll see about the long-term. [ he presses his finished ham sandwich together. ]
[Also, he's definitely finishing the ham right now. He takes his dirty dishes to the sink and starts running water to wash them, making a slight face at the prospect of having to dry his fur yet again. Washing dishes, as it turns out, is kind of annoying when you have paws.]
Gotta admit, it's a lot easier having the whole thing cut up and ready to cook. [He turns his head and gives Tony a wry smile.] I'm not much of a butcher, I'm afraid.
[ tony starts when he finds the platter empty and the ham gone. he estimated the amount to buy based on quick research, even ordered a bit more to be safe, but all that's really left after just a few hours is the turkey. okay, so simba's got calories to catch up on. tony'll order more in the next batch, and order it tonight, too. pepper will look at him funny (and also with the silent judgment of a healthy eater) for this "new diet" he's trying, especially when the meat vanishes faster than humanly possible, but she's a good girl. she won't pry.
he collects himself quickly. ] Hn. Well, [ tony claps simba on the shoulder, ] welcome back to human comforts. Speaking of which, what're you doing? Just leave that in the washer. It'll take care of it. [ to the room: ] JARVIS? Gimme news, [ he orders and bites into his sandwich. across the kitchen, on the windows, a screen like a TV pops up with a reporter talking about president-elect matthew ellis's cabinet choices, the volume mostly used as background noise. ]
[He looks a little bewildered by Tony's instructions, but opens the dishwasher - which he can only identify because Tony pointed it out last night - and puts the dishes inside. That's how it works, right? As he stands up, he catches a glimpse of the projection on the window. He's seen movies in color before, obviously, but newsreels? Not so much.]
No projector. JARVIS can display T.V. on all applicable surfaces, which are chiefly the windows, [ tony explains idly as he munches and watches. the news story switches then to the continuing piracy off the coast of somalia threatening fishers and international shipping alike. tony stands up straighter, his eyes sharpening. ]
Yup. Volume up ten notches. [ the sound grows louder, enough to fill the room. tony takes a slow bite of his sandwich, eyes glued to the news story with the quiet intensity of a man planning to Do Something. ]
[He has a lot of questions about this, but doesn't ask them just yet. The look on Tony's face reminds him of sitting in a darkened movie theater, watching men fight for their lives on grainy black and white footage. And, like then, all he can do is stay here.]
Don't let 'em knock you overboard, [he quips, but the joke falls flat.] Can't imagine you can maneuver much in water.
[ tony's eyes slice over to simba, the constant assessing in them switching targets. he's honestly surprised, firstly that simba could read his intentions so clearly and secondly that he's not protesting tony's involvement. rhodey would tell him to wait for official deployment that'd never come or come too slow, and pepper... pepper would get that anxious look on her face. she'd try to hide it behind a smile and a caveat to be back in time for work, but tony would see it. just nice to have someone in his corner without reservations, even if simba makes a jab at tony's little problem with being underwater, which... no, he probably just means because of the suit. still, it's a weakness tony needs to work on. he can fix both, and he will. ]
Good thing I can fly, [ he chirps back and pops the last bite into his mouth. he pushes off the counter and wipes his hands, bursting into action. ] JARVIS, all hands on deck. Link up to tac-satellites and any ins you get with the Russian and Indian navy databases off the Somali coast. Get chummy with the MSPA and International Maritime Bureau while you're at it.
[ "taking more vacation time, sir?" jarvis says. ]
You bet.
[ "compiling data and initiating mark iv suit-up." ]
[ tony smirks at simba, pride and certainty and purpose in every ounce of his frame. ] I'll shop for your toilet the flight over. Duty calls in more ways than one! [ with that terrible pun, he leaves for the hallway. ]
[Tony's gone before he can offer any more comments, so instead, since Jarvis assures him they'll have a long span of uninterrupted time, they get into a conversation about television, which leads to a discussion about computers and artificial intelligence. At one point, Jarvis helps him find paper and a pen, and he starts clumsily taking notes when the AI starts talking about the Internet. Unlike Tony, his program is able to simplify concepts tremendously, instead of expecting him to build on a pre-existing knowledge database that he simply doesn't have.
When he feels like he's about to fall asleep, he asks Jarvis to put on The Maltese Falcon, and he drifts off to the reassuring sounds of Bogey's voice.
Having learned from the previous morning, Jarvis doesn't wake him up with an alarm, but when he stretches and almost falls off the sofa, the AI does pipe up with his morning recitation. He waves it off and heads to the kitchen to make one of the remaining steaks and fry some (a half-dozen) eggs. While he's cooking, the TV pops up with news footage of Iron Man taking on the pirate vessels. He flawlessly executes some maneuvers that are, in his opinion, purposely flashy - but of course that's what Tony does. The important thing is that he's doing something, and he can't fault him for that.
By evening, when Tony returns, the turkey is soaking in a bath in the sink, as per Jarvis's advice, and he's flopped out on the couch watching Citizen Kane, looking more like a giant fur rug than anything else.]
[ tony makes two passes on the stairs in the living room: one coming up from the workshop in nothing but a thong again, and one coming down from his bedroom freshly showered and dressed in PJ pants and an undershirt. the first pass he doesn't say anything, but he does pause on the living room landing, drinking from a glass of clear alcohol with a cut lime on the rim, and watches the movie for a moment, unabashed in his thong. if simba looks over, tony just smiles and raises his glass in a cheer.
on the second pass, he bounces down with his tablet in hand, saying, ] I'm ordering pizza. Speak now or forever hold your peace, [ and plops into a recliner across from the couch, swiping at his screen. ]
[The sound of Tony coming upstairs wakes him up; he glances over and catches a glimpse of the underwear - or the lack thereof - and although his eyes widen slightly (although he tries to pretend he doesn't enjoy the view on some level), he doesn't seem especially perturbed by the near-nudity. He just goes back to watching the movie.
And when Tony mentions pizza-]
Two extra-large, heavy on the meat. Whatever meat they throw on, I don't care.
[A small part of him feels greedy for ordering so much, but he's also well aware that he can put it away without a problem.]
You wanna watch something else? [A beat, and then-] Maybe all that posing you did after you took care of the pirates?
[ tony sprawls his legs out, slouched back and head lowered to his screen. he waves off the offer at first–whatever simba is watching is fine–but then it's extended and a slow, secretive smile spreads across his face. that means simba watched coverage of him. tony glances up from beneath his brow. ] What can I say? I give the people what they want, and incidentally, they want me.
[He just rolls his eyes. He knows Tony does his heroic shenanigans for the right reasons, but he also seems to spend a lot of time preening and making sure people know about it, and that doesn't sit right with him. Maybe it's because he's a private kind of guy, because deep down he remembers what it's like when you're in the spotlight. People don't see you, they see who they want to see.]
When they wear me out. Enthusiastically, with multiple rounds. [ leering, tony taps more on his screen. he orders jumbo meat lovers for simba, a large cheese for him, and throws in some chicken tenders. ]
A roommate never stopped me before, although I don't think my date tomorrow night is into yiffing, so make yourself scarce when she comes, okay? [ there's no smirk or bluster when tony glances up this time, just the heads-up and an honest plea. besides keeping simba secret, tony genuinely wants this date to go smoothly. he likes lina. she's beautiful, bold, and smart. he rung her up on the flight back; he wants to try a relationship with her. he wants a relationship, period. as fun as the parade of no-strings flings is, they always end in an empty bed.
nothing like a chest full of shrapnel to wake you up to wanting more, he muses darkly and finalizes the order. on the windows, thompson struggles in his pursuit to find the meaning of "rosebud." ]
[He tilts his head slightly - he genuinely doesn't want his presence to affect Tony's life, but at the same time, having someone come over seems hazardous. Pepper, whoever she is, is one thing; Tony seems to trust her implicitly. A stranger is different. But Tony must know what he's doing, or at least trust that his presence is enough to keep her from getting distracted and wandering around the house.]
If you think it's safe.
[He can't help sounding dubious about the notion, though.]
[ tony tosses the tablet onto the table. finally without distractions, he meets simba's eyes, serious. ] I got better security protocols than the Pentagon. It's safe. Just keep closed doors around you and JARVIS will do the rest. If you can't trust me, trust him. He's programmed now to keep you safe.
[He shrugs. Like Tony says, all he has to do is stay in his room and he'll be fine.]
You got some way I can read? These don't do books very well. [He holds up one paw-hand and wiggles the fingers. He can mostly turn pages, though it's right on the bottom line of fine dexterity for him, but the books are far too small in his hands. It's simply not comfortable.]
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Where are your manners? Say please.
[Yes, Tony's being lectured about manners by a guy who spent decades living in a cave.]
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You this nice to all your guests?
[Also, he can't help being sassy, even though he knows damn well Tony's gone above and beyond to accommodate his needs.]
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How often are you planning on getting meat delivered? Just so I know.
[Because he's already worked his way through a decent amount of this delivery, barring the turkey.]
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tony swallows, finally. ] Whaz the... oh, yeah. Every couple days? Just until I find a supplier. Then we'll see about the long-term. [ he presses his finished ham sandwich together. ]
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[Also, he's definitely finishing the ham right now. He takes his dirty dishes to the sink and starts running water to wash them, making a slight face at the prospect of having to dry his fur yet again. Washing dishes, as it turns out, is kind of annoying when you have paws.]
Gotta admit, it's a lot easier having the whole thing cut up and ready to cook. [He turns his head and gives Tony a wry smile.] I'm not much of a butcher, I'm afraid.
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he collects himself quickly. ] Hn. Well, [ tony claps simba on the shoulder, ] welcome back to human comforts. Speaking of which, what're you doing? Just leave that in the washer. It'll take care of it. [ to the room: ] JARVIS? Gimme news, [ he orders and bites into his sandwich. across the kitchen, on the windows, a screen like a TV pops up with a reporter talking about president-elect matthew ellis's cabinet choices, the volume mostly used as background noise. ]
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[He looks a little bewildered by Tony's instructions, but opens the dishwasher - which he can only identify because Tony pointed it out last night - and puts the dishes inside. That's how it works, right? As he stands up, he catches a glimpse of the projection on the window. He's seen movies in color before, obviously, but newsreels? Not so much.]
Where's the screen? And the projector?
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[Although he's not sure he's going to get an answer, judging by the way Tony's paying attention to what's happening on the screen.]
That's happening now? It's not like a newsreel or something?
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Don't let 'em knock you overboard, [he quips, but the joke falls flat.] Can't imagine you can maneuver much in water.
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Good thing I can fly, [ he chirps back and pops the last bite into his mouth. he pushes off the counter and wipes his hands, bursting into action. ] JARVIS, all hands on deck. Link up to tac-satellites and any ins you get with the Russian and Indian navy databases off the Somali coast. Get chummy with the MSPA and International Maritime Bureau while you're at it.
[ "taking more vacation time, sir?" jarvis says. ]
You bet.
[ "compiling data and initiating mark iv suit-up." ]
[ tony smirks at simba, pride and certainty and purpose in every ounce of his frame. ] I'll shop for your toilet the flight over. Duty calls in more ways than one! [ with that terrible pun, he leaves for the hallway. ]
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When he feels like he's about to fall asleep, he asks Jarvis to put on The Maltese Falcon, and he drifts off to the reassuring sounds of Bogey's voice.
Having learned from the previous morning, Jarvis doesn't wake him up with an alarm, but when he stretches and almost falls off the sofa, the AI does pipe up with his morning recitation. He waves it off and heads to the kitchen to make one of the remaining steaks and fry some (a half-dozen) eggs. While he's cooking, the TV pops up with news footage of Iron Man taking on the pirate vessels. He flawlessly executes some maneuvers that are, in his opinion, purposely flashy - but of course that's what Tony does. The important thing is that he's doing something, and he can't fault him for that.
By evening, when Tony returns, the turkey is soaking in a bath in the sink, as per Jarvis's advice, and he's flopped out on the couch watching Citizen Kane, looking more like a giant fur rug than anything else.]
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on the second pass, he bounces down with his tablet in hand, saying, ] I'm ordering pizza. Speak now or forever hold your peace, [ and plops into a recliner across from the couch, swiping at his screen. ]
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And when Tony mentions pizza-]
Two extra-large, heavy on the meat. Whatever meat they throw on, I don't care.
[A small part of him feels greedy for ordering so much, but he's also well aware that he can put it away without a problem.]
You wanna watch something else? [A beat, and then-] Maybe all that posing you did after you took care of the pirates?
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[He just rolls his eyes. He knows Tony does his heroic shenanigans for the right reasons, but he also seems to spend a lot of time preening and making sure people know about it, and that doesn't sit right with him. Maybe it's because he's a private kind of guy, because deep down he remembers what it's like when you're in the spotlight. People don't see you, they see who they want to see.]
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Sorry to cramp your style.
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nothing like a chest full of shrapnel to wake you up to wanting more, he muses darkly and finalizes the order. on the windows, thompson struggles in his pursuit to find the meaning of "rosebud." ]
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If you think it's safe.
[He can't help sounding dubious about the notion, though.]
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[Obviously.]
I just don't trust her.
[He shrugs. Like Tony says, all he has to do is stay in his room and he'll be fine.]
You got some way I can read? These don't do books very well. [He holds up one paw-hand and wiggles the fingers. He can mostly turn pages, though it's right on the bottom line of fine dexterity for him, but the books are far too small in his hands. It's simply not comfortable.]
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